Heat it up, cool it down!

We tend to associate good sex with heat. We use terms like hot, steamy, scorching, searing when describing memorable sex. On the other hand cold showers, cold shoulders, and cold hearts generally aren’t associated with lustful pursuits.

Here are some hot and cold tips to spin your world on its head!
Bring something cold and hot to bed. That bag of frozen peas may not be ready to be cooked rightaway, but wrap it in a t-shirt and bring it into bed tonight.
- Ice-cubes are always there. Dip them in chocolate or strawberry syrup and enjoy licking it off your partner. You don’t want to use the cold to shock your lover. Be sure to wait until things have hit a rhythm in the sex, and then gently touch a less sensitive part of your partner’s body with the cold. Once they know what’s coming, you can experiment heating things up with your bodies, and then cooling it down with a more sensitively placed cold touch.
To heat things up, you can explore everything from silicone toys and glass toys (both of which retain heat and warm up nicely if you soak them in hot water before using).

Tips for steamy sex

Looks have nothing to do with being irresistible in bed. Here's how to notch up your sex appeal


If Brad Pitt is asked to take the 9.55 am local every day, attend back to back meetings, skip lunch owing to work pressure and run errands in the monsoon, there’s all likelihood of his six-pack metamorphosing into a sluggish guy-next-door physique. Each one of us may be a sex God at heart, but very often, looks (we feel) play spoilsport and even before the tricks are out, the (partner’s) mood goes for a toss. High time you take charge and get the oomph score running with these simple tricks.

Dress to undress

The rule of thumb says, ‘The better dressed you are, the easier it is to have your woman undress you.’ To be the alpha male in bed, dress like one out of it. Think about it. If the competition is between a suave sharply dressed, suited man and a dullard who wears an ill-fitted T-shirt and baggy jeans, who do you think will win? Labour (hard) on your fashion quotient and you wouldn’t need to work on the buttons. She will be more than happy to oblige. And that ‘polished’ image will linger on even after you have undressed.
The light matters
There’s a reason why photographers say ‘You look beautiful when the light is right’. The wrong light can make a to-die-for six-pack look positively ghastly, so make sure you use it well. The power-saver white neon bulbs are great. Really. They help conserve energy and we highly respect your ‘Go Green’ attitude. But sadly, they don’t do much to flatter that naked look. For once, switch to gentler yellow lights. Putting them up under lampshades will soften their glow and the flattering light will turn on the heat on your so-so physique.
Body language
When you are gearing up for some action, the last thing you want is a spineless partner crawling around with a disinterested, fallen look on his/ her face. Stand straight, throw back your shoulders and walk like you mean business. Nothing is as strong a turn-on as confidence. Also, the slouched look only accentuates your flat tyres. The correct posture can go a long way to camouflage the series of fat faux pas that are sometimes inevitable. So do yourself a favour and compensate the lack of physical finesse with a dash of attitude.
Aroma therapy
Research claims that a man’s sweat is the most potent turn-on for a woman. While one wouldn’t want to discount that learning, such studies do not exactly hold true in the bedroom. A sweaty stinking you can never be a turn on, no matter what the chemicals say. The Diors and Diesels can give you a hand, but it’s no hard and fast rule. Just make sure you have a shower before you try to get intimate with your partner. A man who smells good, feels good!

Boxers & bras
Ask the marketing guys, and they’ll tell you how crucial packaging is. Point being, do NOT take the easy way out. Make your innerwear work. This is one department where you can have the maximum fun. Get those jock straps out and experiment with cuts and colours. If you are experimental, thongs aren’t that bad an idea (provided you can carry them off). If not, there are boxers — Simpsons, Batman, Popeye, you name it. Knowing what exactly your girl likes helps a great deal. Women have it a lot easier. Knowing the sheer variety of lace and nets out there, there’s enough for every occasion.

Groom for it
A clean groomed look is far more presentable vis-à-vis the hairy disaster men often come with. Yes, some women like their men with hair, but that cannot justify the Amazon on your body. Get bullish in the grooming department and put that trimmer to good use. You are bound to get good dividends after dropping the shirt.
And for your facial hair, either opt for a complete shave, or a two-day stubble at the most. The prickly evening shadow stubble can spell disaster for her skin. Get a flattering haircut to ensure you don’t look sloppy. After all, women (unlike men) like to work their way from the top.

Nothing spicier than vacation sex

Want to pep up your love life? Well, then all you need to do is plan a ‘vacation’ sex with your partner, for it can do wonders for your heart, mind, and soul, according to a new research. Sex on a holiday allows you to get away from pressures, distractions, worries and responsibilities — basically, any of those libido-killers that affect your love life most days of the year, reports the Daily Telegraph While on vacation, you can totally devote yourself to nurturing your sexual needs and desires — and to attending to those of your lover.

This is one of the reasons the vast majority of marriage counsellors recommend a regular weekend away as the one thing that can help a marriage, especially a struggling one. Vacation is the best place to get ‘sexperimental’. People love having sex in new places. This is in large part because of the neurotransmitter dopamine. When people have new experiences, dopamine spikes in the brain, triggering lust.

And with that, many are willing to try something new and exciting. In a new, romantic, or exotic place, lovers can rediscover one another. In trying different restaurants or embarking on a variety of nightlife activities, every evening that you’re away feels like a date night, each with its own distinct backdrop. All of this enhances lovers’ moods, helping them to feel better about one another and more connected. When you make the time for nothing but loving, that’s hopefully what you’re going to get – and lots of it.

Sex will breed the desire for more sex, making both partners feel better about their sex life and the relationship. This is both for couples already content with their sex life and those hoping their vacation will make for some romance repair.